It's OK to fight dirty..... cause cancer does not fight clean!

When I last met with my urologist on October 22nd she told me the C/T scan results would only take a couple of days. She was correct. The nurse called me on Tuesday (Oct 27) and told me the results were in and she would give them to my urologist to take a look at. She didn't call me all week. I even called and left voice mails enquiring for the results but still nothing. Finally on Friday we decided it was time to see a new doctor, this time an oncologist. (Basically a cancer specialist.) We called several that we knew were good and were able to get an opening with Dr. DiFiore who had a cancellation the following Wednesday. Unintentionally it just so happens that Dr. Difiore is the same doctor that treated my dad so many years ago.

Finally Wednesday rolled around and I was starting to get a little anxious. It had been 12 days since the C/T scan and this was going to be the big indicator whether or not the cancer has spread. I asked the staff to 'please make sure they send you the C/T scan results'. My mom decided to attend with me. 22 years ago Dr. Difiore would walk into a similar office, sit down, and say 'you've got 3 to 12 months to live'. It ended up being about 4. I didn't want her to come because I knew it was going to bring back a lot of difficult memories. However, this time around things were much different. C/T scans, clean! No signs of metastasis. Prognosis, EXCELLENT.

However, even with nothing showing up on the scans we knew going in there is a 50% chance the cancer has leaked into my lymph nodes in the form of micrometastasis (too small to be picked up on the scan.) This is why my urologist had recommended surgery to remove lymph nodes in the stomach..... it can confirm if micrometastasis exists. If they find it than you follow it up with 2-3 rounds of chemo. The other two treatment options are chemo or observation. I talked about this in an early blog so I won't go into greater details.

Going into this appointment I felt pretty strongly that even if the C/T scans were clean (which puts my cancer at a stage 1) I was going to lean towards chemo. This is because if I were to do 2 rounds of chemo now than there would only be about a 2% chance of relapse. If I were to wait and the cancer were to return down the road it would require 4 rounds of chemo. That would be 3 straight months of chemo and from what I understand the third and fourth round get pretty bad. So it just seemed to make since to blast it with 2 rounds now and move on with my life.

As we discussed the options with the doctor he felt confident that because of several positive indicators (tumor make-up and blood markers) that it was probably less than 50% chance the cancer has spread. Less than 50 but greater than 20. This made me feel better about just doing observation. It would require C/T scans and blood draws every three months for 3 years.... less frequently after that. My biggest concern with chemo is infertility which is certain to happen. I had my blood drawn yesterday as well, first time since the surgery. I expect them to come back normal but if they come back higher we would likely go with chemo... otherwise it looks like I will be moving forward with regular checkups hoping that the cancer is gone for good.

I am sure I will still be anxious at times knowing the relapse rate is somewhat high. Especially as the quarterly checkups draw closer. I think the biggest thing to know is that if it does show up some time down the road it is going to be just as curable as if we had done chemo right away.... its just going to take a little extra chemo to do it.

I am hoping there won't be much more to post going forward. If it all turns out well than just the occasional 'had quarterly checkup, all clean!' Thank you to everyone who has kept me in their thoughts and prayers. I hope to be able to return the goodness that I have received and help others in the future. The worst feeling I have had going through this was sitting in the waiting room of the cancer center and seeing so many people in far worse and serious conditions than I. Although I was diagnosed with cancer I feel extremely lucky to have had such a curable cancer and an excellent prognosis... it almost feels like cheating. But cancer doesn't fight clean so there is no reason for any of us to fight fair!